


Haven’t Felt Like This My Dear Since Can’t Remember When

by buckys_bitch



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Blood as Lube (almost), Bottom Will Graham, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Smut, F/F, Hannibal Lecter Loves Will Graham, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Murder, Murder Husbands, Parallel Themes and Imagery, Rewrite of season 3, Season/Series 03, Second Chance Romance, Slight Alana Bloom bashing, Slight Jack Crawford bashing, Slight Margot Verger bashing, Tenderness, Top Hannibal Lecter, Vague religious imagery, Will Graham Loves Hannibal Lecter, Will Graham is a Mess, Yearning, canon character death, i can’t blame will for falling in love with hannibal i mean come on, i want this to end up on hannibal tiktok, spoilers but i feel like that's self explanatory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:54:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27668486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buckys_bitch/pseuds/buckys_bitch
Summary: “After everything Will Graham had been through, he was a special kind of stupid following Hannibal Lecter to Italy.”Season 3 rewrite with more hannigram because yes, kissing isn’t necessary, but greatly appreciated, Bryan.
Relationships: Alana Bloom/Margot Verger, Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Comments: 9
Kudos: 82





	1. Kiss Me Once

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will finds Hannibal in Italy.

After everything Will Graham had been through, he was a special kind of stupid following Hannibal Lecter to Italy. He truly didn’t know why he followed, or if he had a valid reason to if he were to ever give it thought. He figured if he didn’t think on it, he wouldn’t have to give it a name. 

There was nothing for Will in Florence. Abigail was not suddenly alive and waiting around, he didn’t even know if Alana wanted him around after all he put her through, and his dogs were safe and secure in Wolf Trap. Hannibal was in Italy, and that was enough to make Will stay. 

Will supposed having Hannibal around made his life more interesting, interesting being subjective. He had definitely overcome his squeamishness around blood and understood the need for a good show more than once. The breakthrough of his distaste for bodily fluids had come from seeing so many lifeless bodies, most of Hannibal’s doing, and his idea of a good show was a skeleton of an extinct species wearing a man’s face as a mask for all museum goers to see. 

Hannibal had changed Will, whether he liked it or not. 

Hannibal had changed many people, apparently. Will wasn’t jealous of Bedelia du Maurier as much as he was covetous. Hannibal had taken care of her in Florence, had made Will’s home into hers, and it made Will’s blood boil. How dare Dr. Lecter give his new lover the still-warm spot in his bed? 

Bedelia didn’t seem to know about Hannibal and Will’s relationship as much as Will had thought, so he couldn’t hold her accountable for much. In fact, Bedelia welcomed Will into their home without asking Hannibal first, and that just solidified how little he had been a subject of their conversations. 

“Will,” Bedelia had smiled brightly, to which Will responded with his own sideways smile. “Dr. du Maurier,” he said, looking down the street. The faint outline of the Apennines made Will’s heart flutter.  _Hannibal had remembered how he loved the view._

“How rude of me? Please come in. Hannibal must be expecting you,” Bedelia said, moving aside to open the door. Will nodded to her with another awkward smile as he made his way inside. There was no use in arguing her and alerting Hannibal to his presence even more. 

The flat itself was gorgeous. Will looked around and felt welcomed by all of the things he knew Hannibal had made special for him. Instead of a large, open kitchen, Hannibal had settled for an expansive galley. He must’ve been suffering for that, especially without Will there to appreciate it. There was also a large fireplace in front of a plush rug, something that Will had mentioned the last time they dreamed up their Italian getaway after a long night spent together. 

“Dr. Fell,” Bedelia smiled smugly, as if Will knew what she meant, “stepped out to give his afternoon lecture at the  _università_ . He’ll be back when he’s back.” 

“I have all the time in the world,” Will said, drifting about the flat. There was a large claw foot tub, one large enough to accommodate two people. Will hoped Bedelia had never used it with someone else, because she’d be a fool not to use it at all. 

He found Bedelia in the study, book propped open on a lectern next to a overly-full glass of wine. Will said nothing as he stared into the glass, trying to seem as if he wasn’t thinking about everything. 

“I’ve read standing when you can is better for circulation of oxygen in your bloodstream,” Bedelia said, pulling her glasses off her nose, setting them down on the book. She turned to look at Will sharply. “By that logic, so does alcohol,” he said, glancing up at her to gauge her reaction. 

“Autism?” she asked. 

“I was told Asperger's, but ASD,” he conceded. 

Bedelia nodded like she had suddenly remembered that about him. 

“Do you want to read something? Anything to drink?” she asked. Will shook his head. Bedelia returned to her book. 

They sat in silence for a while. 

Then, the front door opened. Will looked to Bedelia, who seemed unbothered, and then to the entryway of the study. Sure enough, Hannibal made his way into the room. 

Will tried to hide his quick intake of air. Hannibal was tan, and his hair was salt-and-peppered. He looked edible. 

“Not even a welcome home?” Hannibal asked, wrapping his arms around Bedelia’s waist from behind, kissing behind her ear. “We have a guest,” she said in a flat tone. 

Hannibal looked back and immediately locked eyes with Will. 

Will, who looked tired and greasy, unhappy with being alone, stared back at Hannibal, sun-kissed and hand crafted by the gods, thriving away from the United States. 

“Will?” Hannibal asked, redoing his cuff buttons. “Hannibal,” Will said, and it took all he had not to cry. 

Hannibal paused for a moment, his jaw clenching and unclenching. “How did you find me?” he finally asked. Will chose to ignore that question and answered with his own; “did you not want me to?” 

There was no reply, so Will took to replying to Hannibal’s question. “I followed Abigail.” 

“I have longed for you,” Hannibal blurted in response to Will’s question. 

“I’ll take that as my queue,” Bedelia said, gracefully picking up her book in one hand and her wine in the other before leaving. She closed the French doors behind her. 

“Why did you go without me? Without Abbie?” Will asked. He knew he shouldn’t’ve, he knew that Hannibal had his own private reasons that Will couldn’t really handle, but he had to know. 

Hannibal crossed the room. Will’s eyes fluttered shut, expecting Hannibal to cup his face, to kiss him, to hold him.  _I’m sorry_ , he would say,  _I’m sorry I took our daughter from you. I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was with_ another woman,  _one who I told you you had nothing to worry about_ . 

“Let me see,” was what he really said. His fingers toyed with the bottom of Will’s sweater, but he didn’t dare pull the fabric up himself. Instead, he waited for Will to gently push his fingers away and lift the wool up himself.

Will stood with his abdomen and deep scar on display  _en plein air_ for Hannibal to look at. Hannibal let out a breath of air, letting his fingers trace the line of scar tissue from one of Will’s hips to the other. 

“How did you survive?” Hannibal asked in awe. “Because you care about me or because you want to be better for next time?” Will asked a bit harshly. Hannibal’s face softened, and finally he cupped Will’s cheek. 

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” he said. Will leaned into his hand, wanting to believe it. “Abigail couldn’t be alone, I wanted to give you to her.” 

“She had her father,” Will laughed humorlessly. “She has Garret Jacob Hobbs, I have you,” Hannibal corrected. 

Will just stared up at him lovingly, not saying a word. Hannibal Lecter was here, in the flesh, speaking to Will as if nothing had happened and no time had passed. 

“ _Mano avinėlis_ ,” Hannibal whispered, and Will melted. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Hannibal’s, almost whimpering when Hannibal’s hands fell to their rightful place in Will’s hair like muscle memory. 

Will moved his hands to Hannibal’s face to pull him impossibly closer, needing more from him. Hannibal chuckled and tightened his grip in Will’s hair. 

“It was Chiyoh, wasn’t it?” Hannibal asked, his lips still on Will’s. “How did she know me?” Will asked. He didn’t need any words as an answer, that sly smile was enough. 

“I love you,” Will said. “I love you and I need you, now.” 

“No patience,” Hannibal tsked, “just like a sinner.” 

Will knew the routine. It finally felt like he was home. “Please, please forgive me. I will repent!” 

Hannibal was on him in an instant, throwing Will’s sweater across the room in abandonment and leaning the two of them back on a chaise lounge. 

Will didn’t want to ask how many times Hannibal had done this to Bedelia, how many times they’d been frenzied and needed each other for a release so bad there was no hope in making it to the bed. He didn’t need to ask, either— either Hannibal would change the subject or he’d answer frankly, but neither were what Will needed. 

This, this was what he needed. Hannibal undressing him, telling him he’s beautiful with words and kisses. And finally, when Hannibal was holding him, moving in him, Hannibal whispered, “I forgive you, I love you,” and Will came. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please tell me how you like it 🥺 it means the world to me


	2. Kiss Me Twice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will remembers his recovery.

Will didn’t ever really think Hannibal was capable of love. He wasn’t a true fool. He knew that Hannibal was a psychopathic cannibal murderer, had seen that was what he always had been. 

The thing was, it didn’t really matter. Will didn’t care. That was the scary part. He didn’t care that Hannibal couldn’t love him, or that he killed people to eat them. Will’s love covered all of that, and it was terrifying. 

When Hannibal said he loved Will, Will believed it. It was a blatant lie. Hannibal didn’t love anyone or anything.  _Will didn’t care._

He looked over from his spot on the chaise lounge in the study to Hannibal, still naked, sat at a sketching desk. Will hummed and stretched his arms above his head as his toes curled. 

“You’re finally awake,” Hannibal said, not looking up from his parchment. “I didn’t sleep long, did I?” Will asked, searching around the floor for his briefs and jeans. Hannibal’s slacks... Hannibal’s button up... a-ha! Jeans! 

“You’re getting dressed so soon.” 

Will yanked his pants up over his ass and buttoned them. He crossed the room to sit next to Hannibal. “It took too long to heal,” Will whispered, tracing his large scar. 

Hannibal’s lips quirked a smile. “I imagine it was a turmoil getting them to put everything back where it belonged,” he said, setting his charcoal pencil down. “I saw Alana a lot,” Will said. Hannibal’s smile immediately vanished. 

Will didn’t remember much about his recovery, mostly by choice, but he remembered the time he spent with Alana in her hospital bed. He read to her, helped her with her physical therapy so her hips and legs would heal, and they talked constantly. 

_“How’s your scar looking?” Alana said, gesturing her head to Will’s abdomen. Her hands were firmly planted on her walker as she and Will slowly drifted through her ward’s halls. Will lifted his hospital gown to show Alana his staples just above his waistband. “I’m glad you’re wearing underwear.”_

_“I’d have shown you either way,” Will chuckled. Alana just shook her head with a soft laugh. They rounded the corner to the nurses’ station and Alana’s room._

_“Do you know Margot Verger?” Will asked suddenly. Alana looked to him strangely before entering her room. She left the walker by the door and all but flopped onto her bed._

_“Margot Verger as in_ heir of the Verger meat packing dynasty _Margot Verger?” Alana asked. “Yes,” Will answered succinctly, sitting at her feet._

_“Not personally or professionally, no. Why?” Alana asked. Will looked to the side, then back at his friend. “She— we— when Abigail gutted Nicholas Boyle...,” he began. Alana didn’t seem distracted or as if she followed, so he kept talking._

_“The way an animal is gutted after hunting is a direct cut from sternum to pelvis, right?” Will asked. “I’d assume so. Between the two of us, I’m not the one who would hunt,” Alana said. Will frowned._

_“Do you know what happened to Margot Verger?” Will asked. “She recently lost her baby,” Alana nodded. Will shook his head. “Her brother, Mason— he took the baby. He cut it out of her, and took her uterus, too.” He left out the part that the baby was his._

_Alana gasped, then clutched her side where Will knew she had a row of stitches. “That’s horrible, is she alright?” she asked. Will shrugged. “It is horrible. Mason wanted control over her family, her children. Luckily she only has a common C-section scar,” Will said, hoping Alana could see where he was going._

_Alana thought for a moment. “Show me your wound again,” she said. Will stood and hoisted his gown with him. The dull grey of the staples did nothing to damper the dark, angry red of his forming scar tissue. Alana frowned._

_“Hannibal didn’t just cut you open that night, he killed Abigail,” Alana said. Will nodded. “He took my child, he took my ability to have any more without him,” he said. “In his mind,” Alana clarified._

_Will sat in silence, waiting for this to finish processing in Alana’s mind as she stared off at the far wall._

_“Hannibal gave you a Cesarean because he loves you,” Alana finally said, her voice breaking. “He can’t love you, he just knows that he should.”_

_“Is that so bad?” Will whispered back, resting a hand firmly on his stomach. Alana just glanced at him, eyes full of sympathy._

“What did you talk about?” Hannibal asked, standing. Will stood up next to him, placing a hand on his chest. “Her, her recovery. She was almost paralyzed,” Will said, moving his hand from Hannibal’s chest to his face. 

Hannibal’s eyes fluttered shut, and Will smiled. “I was proud of Abigail,” Hannibal said, kissing Will’s palm. The  _for attempting murder, especially on Alana Bloom_ ,  was implied. “I was too, for standing up for herself,” Will said. Hannibal wrapped his arms around Will and kissed him soundly. 

“You know that I wouldn’t have had children without you?” Will asked. Hannibal softened even more so. “I am not fit for parenthood,” he said, his hands moving back to Will’s curls. Will smiled brightly. 

“ _We_ are,” he said, brushing a stray hair from Hannibal’s face. “We can do it together.” 

“They’ll never let me adopt,” Hannibal said. Will shook his head. “We’ll find a way, I swear. If you want it, I will give it to you.” 

Hannibal grinned widely, something Will missed the sight of. “I forgot who I was talking to,” he said, bringing Will in for another kiss. Will let himself be wrapped in Hannibal’s false comfort. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is kind of a filler, but i promise the next few chapters will feed you well. comments and kudos appreciated <3


	3. Then Kiss Me Once Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will is denied access to Hannibal and remembers when Hannibal didn’t love him back.

Jack Crawford didn’t catch Hannibal. He never could’ve, anyway. Hannibal gave himself up willingly. 

Will didn’t know what plan Hannibal was working on, or how it would play out. He figured it didn’t really matter anyway, as long as they would reunite in the outside again.

It ached to be away from Hannibal for that long. They’d been apart for almost two years before Italy, but after waking up to Hannibal’s sculpted face every day for five weeks, Will’s bed felt empty.

“You can’t let yourself fall into his trap again, Will,” Alana said. Margot Verger was sat next to him across from Alana at her desk.

“It’s not a trap,” Will said defensively, crossing his arms. His hand subconsciously drifted to protect his scar. “Because he really loves you?” Margot questioned.

Will glared at her. “Because he cares about me, and I am safe if he cares about me.”

“Until he doesn’t care about you anymore,” Alana said. “Or is it because you genuinely love him?” Margot asked, crossing her arms.

Will’s hands now pushed on his scar, keeping it away from the women.

Margot untucked her blouse and slid the waistband of her slacks down slightly to show off her own scar. “Did Mason do this because he loved me or because he thought he loved me?” she asked.

“It’s different,” Will said, standing up. “Don’t even think about telling me it isn’t!”

“This is my hospital, and you’re not seeing him, Will. End of story,” Alana said. She stood slowly to reach Will’s height. “And if that is all, I’ll kindly ask you to leave, Mr. Graham.”

Will tried not to snarl as he left. He would’ve done anything to let Hannibal out and back home. Who was Alana, keeping an intellectual in a cage?

Will went home alone nonetheless. He knew that any mail between him and Hannibal was intercepted, or maybe not even delivered, so Will didn’t even bother writing. They had no communication and Will was withering without it.

“He knows you love him,” Abigail said. Will rolled his eyes as he followed through with his turn signal into his driveway. “Does he? I used to think that he hated me when I didn’t see him this long,” Will said.

“He told me once that you would take care of me, because he knew you were more than capable of it. He said you would make an excellent father,” Abigail said. Will wanted to cry. Hannibal had said that to him, too. It was hard to believe.

“Abbie,” Will started. She looked at him expectantly. “When did you become my grown young woman?”

Abigail giggled in the way that made Will happy to be alive. “When I went to university, dad. I’m away for a few months and you forget about me!”

Will looked from his house to the empty passenger seat and sighed heavily.

As he got out of his car and made his war into his house, he thought on the last conversation he had with Hannibal in Italy.

_ “How about Cuba?” Will had suggested, pulling his plain nightshirt over his head. Hannibal was still sex-drowsed and naked, lying back on the excess of pillows he kept on the bed. “What’s in Cuba?” he asked, voice hoarse. _

_ “Not Jack or Alana,” Will said as if it were obvious, because it definitely was. “There are no mountains or bays, both things you insisted on me looking for,” Hannibal said. “And you left without me,” Will frowned. _

_ “I need to ask Bedelia what she plans to do with herself when I’m gone,” Hannibal said, disregarding Will. “Because she’s going to decide where we’re living?” Will demanded, looking back at Hannibal. _

_ Hannibal just stared back, seemingly disinterested. “Do you have something you’d like to get off your chest?” he asked. Will deflated. “You two... when I was gone?” he asked. Hannibal patted his lap. _

_ Will climbed over to him and sat on his thighs. Hannibal’s hands slid under Will’s shirt, settling on his waist. “Not once did I sleep with her and not think of ruining you,” Hannibal whispered, squeezing Will’s obliques. “But you still did it,” Will choked up. _

_ “Did you expect me to wait? I had appearances to uphold, Will,” Hannibal said. “But you don’t regret it?” Will asked. Hannibal didn’t say anything or change his expression to look more sympathetic. _

_ “Thank you for being honest,” Will said, rolling off of Hannibal’s lap. He grabbed his pants and walked out of the room wiping tears from his eyes. _

Will shook his head, almost as if physically removing himself of the memory. He opened his front door and let the dogs run out into the field, then stepped inside to prepare their meals.

He believed in raw feeding for his animals. He bought mince, farm fresh eggs, bone broth, gizzards, uncooked bone, and any supplements his dogs would need for clean teeth and a healthy coat. His dogs were truly beautiful. 

Will knew that if he was ever indisposed, Hannibal would treat his dogs to the best. He claimed to hate animals, and never liked cuddling with any of them, but Will caught him napping with them more than once on the bay window in his sun room. Hannibal’s secret favorite, Will’s sheltie McCaffrey, was tucked up under his arm, content in being held.

There wasn’t a moment Will thought about his life and didn’t imagine Hannibal over his shoulder, holding him and telling him it would be alright no matter what happened. Even when he was in the penitentiary, he longed for the day when he could see Hannibal fully again.

Even still, Will went to bed alone every night, falling asleep to the smell of Hannibal’s cologne on his pillow. It was almost like he was there, watching over him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> much love <3


	4. It’s Been a Long, Long Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will gets to see Hannibal in prison after three years of pining because of the rise of the Red Dragon.

“You’re too codependent on him,” Jack said, and Will could tell he was trying not to raise his voice. “But he knows who the Red Dragon is, and we need to catch this guy before he hurts another family,” Will said, trying not to sound like he was pleading.

It had been three years since Will had seen Hannibal’s face and he was being driven sparse by every day that passed without him.

“Hannibal seems to know everything these days,” Alana said, bouncing her little boy on her knee. Jack glared at her before turning his attention back to Will.

“Look, Will, I’m going to be honest with you,” Jack started. “I feel guilty for even putting you in Hannibal’s sphere of influence, so the least I can do is keep you from him cold turkey. You are not permitted to see Dr. Lecter.”

“By her orders!” Will exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at Alana. “You’re actively avoiding solving this case to keep me around longer.”

“I want you to be able to go home to your wife!” Jack shouted. Alana’sboy became fussy. She stood up with him in her arms and promptly left the room, side-eyeing Will as she walked past.

Will waited for the door close to continue talking. “Don’t you see, Jack?” he asked, voice low. “I can’t go home to my wife. I need to see Hannibal, I need to know he still cares about me. I can’t live without him.”

“And that’s my fault.”

“You’re damn right it is. I could go home to my wife, but I’m here, wanting to see a cannibal murderer to solve a case in which another man is murdering people because he feels like a dragon. Me needing to see Hannibal is not the strangest thing we’ve talked about in the past 24 hours.”

Will turned on his heel and stormed out of the office, passing Alana on his way. He trotted down the marble steps of the institution, all the way down to the bottom floor. Frustrated and upset, he sat on one of the cold benches in the atrium.

“The only reason I don’t want you to see him is because I don’t want this to be you, Will,” Alana said. Will looked up to her in surprise. “You’re more than this obsession.”

Will thought for a moment. “What if I’m not?” he asked softly. Alana made her signature sympathetic face, and Will felt like punching something. “You’re a husband, and a father,” she said.

“Divorce is easy, and Wally isn’t mine,” Will protested, not looking at Alana. He wanted to believe that Molly and Walter didn’t matter to him. “I want to be Hannibal’s husband, the father of his children.”

There was no time to address what he had said, admitting it for the first time out loud even to himself. Jack found them, standing off to the side with the Verger baby on his hip. Alana crossed to pick up her son as she coddled him.

“You might have to let Will see him, Alana,” Jack said, and Will felt his stomach lurch. “Why?” she asked, petting her son’s hair. “He was right, about the Red Dragon. If Hannibal knows who he is, he’s more likely to talk to Will about it,” Jack shrugged.

They both turned to look at Will, individually calculating the risk of him seeing Hannibal. Will was shaking with excitement. He’d be seeing Hannibal for the first time since Italy, and he missed the doctor dearly.

Hannibal looked good, all things considered. 

The glass wall that kept him from interacting with the outside world seemed like torture. The books would eventually run out, and there wouldn’t be enough charcoal pencils in the world to last a lifetime of imprisonment.

Will was breathless, seeing his love in a jumpsuit. Hannibal didn’t look too happy, but that was to be expected.

“It’s been so long,” Will said, trying to regain his composure. “And why is that?” Hannibal asked, his words biting.

The smile faded from Will’s face. “They wouldn’t let me see you. I’ve been trying for weeks,” he said, grabbing the holes in the glass wall.Hannibal didn’t move. “You didn’t even write to me,” he said, his hands clasping behind his back. Will’s own hands fell from the glass as he backed away from Hannibal.

Will decided not to answer Hannibal as Hannibal often didn’t answer him. “You know the Red Dragon.”

“I do, do I?” Hannibal asked. “How do you know this for sure?”

“He was your patient. He seemed to know me,” Will said, pushing up his glasses as if he were innocuous. Hannibal glared at him. “You saw him at the museum then?” he asked, tilting his head up.

“So you do know him?” Will asked. Hannibal didn’t say anything. “Yes, I saw him at the museum. I was thrown against an elevator wall, then  out of the elevator, and I found that distasteful.”

Hannibal quirked a smile. “You know what we do with distasteful people,” he said. Will sent him a disapproving look. “What you do with distaste is different than what I do.”

“I find eating to be something everyone can relate to, and cooking to be something hardly anyone can relate to.”

“What kind of metaphor is that? You can talk a big game but it means nothing if you can’t walk the walk?” Will asked. Hannibal didn’t seem to understand. “Everyone knows how killers kill—but almost never why.”

“So you’re saying you think I should kill Dolarhyde in a way that has to be hidden but make sure everyone knows that I kill him?” Will asked. Hannibal nodded. “You’re not even hiding the manipulation anymore.”

Hannibal frowned. “I’m not manipulating you. If I could follow my own advice, I would. The Red Dragon will stop at nothing, and neither should you.” Will shook his head. “You think that I’d get away with murder at this point? With Jack and Chilton and Alana and Freddy Lounds on my case? Not a chance.”

“You underestimate yourself. I remember you saying to me once, ‘If you want it, I will give it to you.’ Was that a lie?” Hannibal asked. Will softened. He moved closer to the glass, not knowing whether or not to motion to Hannibal. “I’m not a liar. I’m many things, but I’m not a liar.”

“I know. I know,  _mano meilė_ . Prove it to me. Have the Dragon killed, and this will all end.”

“You wouldn’t be free,” Will said, surprised. “Do I need to be free? You know where I am, always,” Hannibal said, stepping towards the glass.

“I need to kiss you every time I see you,” Will said breathlessly.

“How’s your wife?” Hannibal asked. Every word he said cut like a knife. Will stared back in shock.

“Not— she won’t be my wife for much longer.”

“Oh, don’t divorce on my behalf,” Hannibal said, almost sounding amused. “Besides, what can I do here? The memories I have of you are enough.”

Will wanted to cry, but he steeled himself. “‘Did you expect me to wait? I had appearances to uphold, Will. ’  How do you think I felt? Did you even care?” Will demanded. “What do you want from me?”

“What I wanted was to elope, to run off to Italy with my husband and daughter,” Hannibal spat. “Do you think I didn’t want that, too? Do you think I staged a death to make you hate me on purpose?” Will asked, almost beginning to yell.

“I think you can’t control anyone around you so you become everyone around you. I cannot keep you with me when you are Jack Crawford’s pawn,” Hannibal said. Will felt ridiculous as tears spilled down his cheeks while Hannibal was seemingly unbothered, but he didn’t waiver.

“And so what, you kill Abigail in front of me to teach me a lesson? What good that did. I still love you, Hannibal. I’m obsessed with you. And you did it! You made an unfaltering follower. Are you happy? Are you happy that you killed our daughter? That I love you unconditionally? That I love the way you smile when you’ve killed another human being? The way you look at me like you want to eat me alive? The way you lay me down so sweetly before wrecking me beyond compare? What more do you want from me?”

Will was shaking; with rage or anxiety, he couldn’t tell. Hannibal looked unimpressed, the thin line of his lips becoming his default.

“I want you to leave.”

Silence permeated the room. Will caught his breath. “Fine. We’ll use some of your room to make a cell for Dolarhyde, and you’ll forever be tormented by what you lost.”

The free man turned on his heel and marched out of the basement cell. 


	5. Long, Long Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hot sex and murder.

The plan was simple: Dolarhyde and Hannibal were to be gunned down by FBI snipers before either of them had the chance to kill the other. Plans often fail when Will Graham is involved.

As soon as the police escorted van crashed, Will felt his ears ringing and his head rock against his skull. He thought about Molly and Wally alone in her hospital room, wondering if they’d ever see him again, or if they even wanted to see him again.

The concussion felt like encephalitis. He was overwhelmed and disoriented. When he looked over to see if Hannibal was alright and saw an empty cage, he thought he was dreaming.

“The Dragon didn’t let us go for nothing,” Hannibal said, and Will’s head ached horribly. He figured Hannibal didn’t care about a mild concussion, so he didn’t mention anything about feeling upended. 

“What are we going to do? We’re in the middle of no where,” Will said, climbing out of the van, past Hannibal’s mask and straightjacket, wondering when he was going to wake up. “Your imagination is so limited for a man so intelligent,” Hannibal said, a genuine smile painted across his face.

He opened the door to one of the cop cars and dragged the officer out of the vehicle. “Like pigs to a slaughter,” he tsked, leaving the body by the side of the road. Will stared in amazement, wanting to jump Hannibal’s bones immediately. “Are you coming?” Hannibal asked, and Will sprang into action, mirroring Hannibal’s disposal of bodies.

When they arrived to the house on the bluff, Will stared off into the Atlantic for a long while. How had it been that a few years ago, he was a man with strong values and an iron will? He would’ve never associated with people like Hannibal Lecter, nor even sought them out.

Yet, here he was, wrapped up in one of Hannibal’s cozy sweaters, feeling the salty sweet breeze of the ocean spray, holding a warm cup of hot chocolate, staring contently into the water knowing that he would be safe no matter how the night went.

“Deep in thought, are we?” Hannibal asked smugly, shutting the back door behind him. Will glanced back at him, then back to the sea. “Just remembering me before you,” he said, then sipped his drink.

Hannibal wrapped his arms around Will’s middle from behind and leaned onto his shoulder. “Were you a sad, empty man?” he asked softly, kissing Will’s neck. “Something like that,” Will chuckled, lacing his fingers from his free hand with Hannibal’s.

Hannibal said nothing as he joined Will in looking out into the water.

“Humor me,” Will said. He turned around in Hannibal’s arms and placed his hand on Hannibal’s cheek. “Tell me you love me.”

“I love you. I truly believe I am in love with you, Will,” Hannibal said. Will smiled. “And there’s nothing I can do to change that?” Will asked.

“If you could move stars, I’d love you even more.”

Will practically melted into Hannibal’s chest. He placed a kiss on Hannibal’s neck, then cheek, then pressed their lips together soundly.

“Humor me,” Hannibal said against Will’s lips, “and show me you love me.”

Will smiled roguishly, dropping his hand to link with Hannibal’s. He led the way inside, leaving his hot chocolate mug on some surface that neither of them would have to worry about later. He stumbled his way to the large master bedroom, then stopped.

Hannibal crowded his space and backed him up to the wall. “How do you know what I want without me ever speaking it to you?”

Will batted his eyelashes and bit his lip. “Do I have to ask you what I want?”

Hannibal all but dragged Will into the bedroom, picking him up by the hips and tossing him backwards on the bed. Will was impressed, but not shocked.

“You, my little lamb,” Hannibal said, pausing as he moved to kneel at the foot of the bed, looming over Will, “deserve this.”

Hannibal crawled over to Will and let the younger man stretch upwards to meet his lips. Will pulled Hannibal’s head down to a more manageable position, with Hannibal’s arms braced on either side of Will.

“Take my clothes off, take them off,” Will gasped, clawing at the sweater. “This is mine!” Hannibal said, throwing the item over his head nonetheless. He then pulled Will’s long sleeve cotton shirt off, followed by his jeans.

Will leaned back, his body fully on display for Hannibal to see. Hannibal sat back on his feet to view Will in his entirety.

Will’s curls sat untamed on top of the pristine white pillowcase. His back was arched up into Hannibal’s touch, urging the psychiatrist to mark him accordingly. There was no hair on his chest; instead, a trail led into his boxers. His toned legs were uncrossed and slightly opened, as if beckoning Hannibal closer.

“I want to ruin you,” Hannibal said. Will let out a shaky breath. “We may have the time,” he said, cupping one of Hannibal’s cheeks.

Hannibal leaned down and kissed him softly, snaking an arm under Will’s back to lift his arch. His other hand found its way to where it belonged— Will’s hair. Will moaned softly, opening his mouth for Hannibal to claim.

They lazily made out for a few minutes, letting the room fill with the sound of their sloppiness. Spit slowly rolled down Will’s chin. “You are a mess,” Hannibal said, sitting upright. Will wiped his chin with the back of his hand, smiling sheepishly.

“I would cut you, and use your blood as slick, but I don’t know what the Dragon will do to you,” Hannibal said, his voice muffled by his pressing of kisses down Will’s thighs. Will whimpered and pressed his hips up in an attempt to grind against something.

Hannibal provided his hand, letting Will whine and clutch at the sheets as he rocked into Hannibal’s palm. “Instead, I will use your come.” Will downright mewled. Hannibal smiled wide. He leaned down to graze his teeth at Will’s jugular, kissing and nipping there.

Will’s hips rocked harder and faster, working himself up to release. “Yes, come pretty for me,” Hannibal groaned, kissing Will’s jaw, behind his ear, and then his temple before pulling away. Will knew Hannibal’s eyes were on him as he threw his head back and came in his underwear, staining them like a teenager. 

“Oh, my messy boy,” Hannibal said, dipping his fingers into Will’s come. He stuck them in his mouth obscenely, hollowing his cheeks around them. Will whimpered, indisposed.

Soon enough, Hannibal hooked his fingers into Will’s boxers and slid them down his legs, careful to leave the cooling mess on his pelvis, and threw them across the room. “There, how pretty you are,” he said, a hand pressing his hips down into the mattress.

Will smiled weakly, trying to hide his face. “Don’t hide from me,” Hannibal said. “Be loud.”

He swiped the come up from the plane of Will’s stomach and quickly moved it to his hole. Will’s hips stuttered as he felt Hannibal prodding at his entrance. “Not like Mason,” he whispered, spreading his legs further.

“Not like Mason,” Hannibal said softly, squeezing Will’s thigh with his free hand. “I am here to see your chest heave in pleasure, not to see you squirm.”

Will nodded, his eyes rolling back in his head. His hole fluttered as Will pressed a finger into him, feeling overstimulated as it was.

“You’re so dressed,” he whispered. “It seems I am,” Hannibal said, looking down at himself. He looked uncomfortably warm with flushed cheeks. He pulled his hands away from Will and pulled his sweater up over his head effortlessly.

Hannibal was almost the opposite body of Will. He had a more feminine figure, in his hips and posture. However, where Will was smooth, Hannibal was all wiry grey hair.

Will’s mouth dropped open in unconfined craving and desire. Hannibal was immediately back to pushing his fingers into Will, trying to be gentle.

“We don’t know when Dolarhyde will be here,” Will said, and Hannibal glanced at him. Will decided in that moment he preferred the man with longer hair. “Do you want me to hurt you?” Hannibal asked. Will figured he was annoyed, but didn’t bother to care.

“Please,” he said, voice broken. Hannibal took a deep breath before continuing.

He plunged two more fingers into Will, making him cry out in pain and surprise.

“You said you wanted to be hurt,” Hannibal said, trying not to sound too happy about the permission. Will’s eyes rolled back as his head lolled backwards. He could hear Hannibal spit, but didn’t know it was for him until he felt the fingers sliding easier.

Hannibal fingerfucked Will until he deemed Will was ready to take him fully. It was not nearly as long as normal, and even then it felt achingly burning.

Hannibal unzipped his pants and pulled out his hardening cock. He spit in his hand again and began pumping himself, using one of Will’s legs to pull him to the edge of the bed.

“What are you doing?” Will asked as Hannibal swung his legs so that his feet were planted firmly on the floor. “Sit on my lap,” Hannibal said. Will wasted no time crawling onto Hannibal’s thighs, hovering himself over Hannibal’s pumping hand.

“Sit,” Hannibal said, and Will pushed himself down all at once.

His body screamed for him to stand, to walk around the room to regain some of the walking abilities he would soon lose. He felt like he was being split in half. Will grit his teeth as he sunk his nails into Hannibal’s back.

Hannibal shushed him, one hand wrapped protectively around Will’s back and the other laced in Will’s curls. “You are safe in my arms,” he whispered, kissing underneath Will’s ear. Will just nodded, tears rolling down his cheeks as he tried to adjust.

“I’m going to move,” Hannibal said in warning, not giving Will any time to process before he thrust up once. Will cried out and wrapped his legs around Hannibal’s waist. Hannibal thrusted up again and again, each time earning a shout from Will.

A rhythm figured itself out, and after every slap of skin, a yelp escaped Will. After Will felt numbed and sated, all that he could manage were soft whimpers. His head drooped onto Hannibal’s shoulder and Hannibal moaned loudly.

“Don’t stop,” Will mumbled. “Just like that.”Sweet little moans escaped him every time he was fully seated.

“ _ Mylimasis _ ,” Hannibal panted, drawing Will down and as close as possible. Will knew Hannibal was coming before he felt it wet and hot inside of him. He came again, this time across Hannibal’s abdomen.

Will grabbed Hannibal’s face and pulled him in for a deep kiss. “I want to do so much more to you,” Hannibal said, unmoving. Will didn’t want him to, anyway. “I want you to do everything to me,” Will panted, his nails raking the back of Hannibal’s neck.

“We have Dolarhyde to worry about,” Hannibal said, wiping the sweaty hair from Will’s forehead. “I think that’s the first time you’ve called him by his real name,” Will chuckled, pressing a soft kiss to Hannibal’s cheek.

Hannibal said nothing as he smiled.“We need to clean up, Will,” he said. He indulged Will in one last kiss before pulling out and heading to the linen closet to grab a washcloth to clean them up. Will felt stretched and empty and sore.

Hannibal cleaned them both up. He zipped his pants back up and redid his belt buckle. He found his sweater and pulled that on over his head, adjusting it as needed.

Will didn’t want to move from this. For the first time since Italy, Will had felt peace.

“Hey, messy,” Hannibal said, leaning over Will. “Hmm?” Will asked, his eyes fluttering shut. “You can’t be tired before we kill this man,” Hannibal said, handing Will his clothes. Will groaned in annoyance but sat up anyway, dressing himself.

The two of them walked into the living room, hand in hand. Hannibal had snatched up wine glasses and a well-aged bottle of white from the kitchen as they passed by.

Hannibal poured Will a glass, then handed it to him. The both took a sip. “They can see us,” Will said, leaning into Hannibal’s space, pressing their lips together chastely. “Yes, they can,” Hannibal smiled, moving away to pour himself a glass.

A shot rang out as a bullet burst through the glass window, through Hannibal, and shattered the wine bottle. 

Hannibal fell to the ground as Francis stepped into the room, carrying a muffled assault rifle. Will watched, partly horrified and partly yearning, as Dolarhyde moved over Hannibal and stood next to him.

“You did as promised,” Francis said, nodding to Will dismissively. Hannibal glared up at him, expecting him to do something. Will shook himself of the stupor and reached behind him to grab the gun off of the mantle. Before he could draw the weapon, Dolarhyde stabbed him in the cheek.

Instead of going into shock like before, Will tackled Dolarhyde, pushing him back out into the night. He sunk the knife from his face deep into Dolarhyde’s shoulder, but that only made him angry. He threw Will off of him and held the knife against Will’s throat.

Hannibal jumped out onto the patio, holding Dolarhyde’s gun at the man himself. “Let him go.”

Dolarhyde raised his arms, backing off of Will, whose face was still bleeding profusely. The man was panting, chest heaving, as he looked Hannibal up and down. “You’re going to shoot me? That’ll be the end of the Great Red Dragon?” Dolarhyde challenged. “You can’t take me yourself?”

At that, Hannibal dropped the gun and threw himself at Dolarhyde, knocking the two of them to the ground. They wrestled, but eventually Dolarhyde threw Hannibal back into a pile of wood, an axe clanging off the pile onto the tiled patio next to his head.

Will threw his whole body weight behind the hunting knife, cutting Dolarhyde’s peroneal tendon. The man dropped to the his knees.

When Hannibal felt well enough to stand, he took the axe and swung it at Dolarhyde’s neck, hard enough to cut deep into his jugular vein. Blood sprayed everywhere as the Dragon howled in pain.

Will and Hannibal watched as the life bled out of him down the patio onto the grass at the far edge of the bluff. He was long gone by the time Will sank into a puddle of the still-warm blood at his feet.

He sobbed into his hands, letting go of everything that had been hounding him for the past five years of his life. Hannibal said nothing as he watched.

As Will’s full-body wracking subsided, Hannibal offered him his hand. Will accepted and stood, looking up at the man before him. He looked tired and worn, and in desperate need of a tan.

Hannibal handed him the hunting knife.

“Do it,” he said, nodding to Dolarhyde’s body. “Do what?” Will asked, taking the knife in his unsteady hands.

“Start a new life.” Will immediately understood.

He lifted Dolarhyde’s bloodied shirt, and stared at his bare stomach. He considered the knife, and his own scars, and what this meant going forward. It didn’t matter. Hannibal was with him now, free,  _en plein air_ .

Will slid the knife from one hip bone to the other, exposing the fat layer under Dolarhyde’s skin.

“Oh, how I’ve waited for this,” Hannibal said, helping Will stand. He pulled Will close and kissed him deeply, Dolarhyde’s blood pressed in handprints on Will’s cheeks. Will did the same, painting Hannibal’s hair a dark, deep red.

Hannibal guided Will to the edge of the bluff and pointed straight down to the water. There was a small fishing boat with someone standing at the helm.

“What—?”

“Chiyoh,” Hannibal said, smiling. “She can’t resist a good love story. Will felt his heart swell. “Love story,” he said, wrapping his arms around Hannibal’s neck. Hannibal wrapped his arms around Will’s waist.

“We have to fall,” he said, “before they catch us.”

Hannibal was in his arms, safe and secure, and happy. He had slain the Dragon. He had created a new life from the Dragon. They were going to Cuba, and they were going to be happy for as long as they could.

Will smiled. He leaned over the side of the bluff and let gravity take him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!! this is it!! im considering extending this into their life in cuba in a second installment!! if you liked this, keep your eyes peeled for that. have a good day, and much love to you <3


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